How To: this is new self help 2

How to get a kick when you’re bored of life

Head down to the two dollar shop and choose the ugliest shade of nail polish imaginable. Take it home, apply to coats and snigger at yourself in the mirror. Then imagine the breed of person who actually likes that colour and snigger some more.

Ask the guy in a random shop/café for his number. Act entirely confident and most likely he will be so blown away by your boldness that, stammering somewhat, he will dutifully hand it over. Give him a smouldering look and leave, never to call him. Then you will know how guys feel when they never call you and say they will. What a fantastic power trip.

Call up your most rock and roll of friends and get hammered on a Monday night. Rebel.

Buy a two dollar scratchy, scrape away at half the card, and then throw the entire thing into the fire to burn. The frustration will make you feel alive.

How To - this is the new self help

How to feel good about yourself when you’re not feeling good about yourself:

Have a backup “bad day” outfit on hand that you know makes you look great, for those heavy period days, hung over days, or boyfriend-just-broke-up-with-you days. Wear the outfit only when you are in your most dire of straits. My bad day outfit looks like this: my best bum jeans, comfy wedges, slim-fit singlet and a blazer with the sleeves rolled up. Chic, but relaxed. If I’m having an entire bad week, I simply change the singlet daily, so nobody guesses that I’m secretly falling to pieces.

Cull your wardrobe. It’s a double whammy in that it is like an emotional detox, and you get that warm fuzzy do-gooder feeling inside when you drop it all off at the Sallies.

Book yourself in for a massage. Sounds overly self indulgent I know, but half an hour spent with a masseuse in training from the school of massage does wonders for your stress levels and self esteem, and not much to your pocket. If you are flush enough to go to the established pros then by all means splash out, but $15 at the school of massage is pretty hard to pass up.

Run away on a wet afternoon to the local library and immerse yourself in unusual hobby magazines – the more bizarre, the better. It can be highly amusing and escapist to explore other peoples’ strange obsessions, and who knows – you may be sufficiently inspired to take up crocheting picture frames yourself.

Copycats?

Siwy Denim

Is it just me or does the S/S 09 collection by American denim brand Siwy look suprisingly similar to the Lonely Hearts Club from spring/summer 2006? Looks like we might have a bit of influence on those Yankees after all.

Lonely Hearts Club

Stolen Flowers

Calvin Klein bra, Stolen Flowers

Photo: Bron Williams

Currently Channeling...Le Smoking

Le Smoking. Le hair. Le glasses. Le polish. Le pants. Go forth and mimic.

The Boots

Guess by Marciano. I have been salivating over them since I found them online two nights ago. They are old news for the other side of the world so are all of $US126. The only struggle is getting them here from the USA - it will be tough, but I won't give up.

Bravo Victoria

Except for a mild morbid interest much like investigating a dead bird, our Lady Beckham has never really got me going. I was, however amused by the ad campaign for her new line of dresses. It seems like her experience in the Marc Jacobs ads inspired her (or her gangs of ideas people) to do something a bit quirky. Watch and see.